With a rebellious teen who is constantly battling you, challenging you, disrespecting you, or reacting with violent behavior, you may feel at the end of your rope.

Certainly, no one could blame you for feeling like you have nothing left to give to your teen. You may find yourself returning their angry outbursts with anger and yelling of your own. You might even find yourself screaming at them to get out of your house.

No one wants or deserves to feel afraid and unsafe in their own home. If you’ve reached this point, you could find that you simply don’t want to deal with your teen any longer. Plus, you may have younger children in the household to worry about.

• While it is understandable that you want to remove your troubled teen from your home, you may need to consider all of the consequences of taking this step.

With this considered, let’s examine the legal considerations.

Legal Considerations

If your teen is a minor and doesn’t have another parent or family member to go to after being removed from your home, you could be facing serious legal consequences.

Laws vary by city and state when it comes to parenting, but when it comes to the abandonment or endangering of children, the laws are firm across the board. The only exception is if the courts have legally emancipated the minor.

Let’s discuss the difference between an emancipated minor and one who is not.

An emancipated minor:

Courts have the power to legally sever the relationship between parents and children. Parents will no longer need to be responsible for providing their children with a home, food, or education.

• The emancipated child will then be given complete responsibility for their own life and welfare. It is important to note that teens cannot petition for emancipation until they are fourteen in California and sixteen in most other states.
• Parents of an emancipated minor face no legal consequences if their teen is kicked out of their home.

Minors who are not emancipated. 

• If your teen is under the age of 18, they are considered to be underage in most states. If you kick your minor teen out of your home, this is considered to be abandonment. This is a crime, and you can face legal consequences, no matter where your teen moves to.
• What if your teen goes to stay with a friend? If you don’t communicate with him or her and fail to support them financially, this can still be considered abandonment. Legal abandonment is a serious concern that can bring with it fines and jail time.

The bottom line is that even if your teen is abusive, non-responsive, and living out of your home, you are still legally required to communicate with them and provide them with financial support.

Legal Concerns Aside

If you set aside the legal concerns you’re potentially facing, you should consider the emotional and mental side of kicking your teen out of the house.

• As your child’s parent, you are responsible for taking care of your teen. He or she may be engaging in activities that are threatening their safety and the safety of others in the household, but kicking your teen out of the home to fend for themselves may not be the right choice.
• Troubled teens need limits, boundaries, consequences, and to know that they are safe and loved. The teen years can feel impossibly difficult. It would be best if you did not allow your teen to control your home, control you, and threaten your other children.

With that said, you would likely feel immense concern, guilt, and face mental health concerns if you kick your teen out. This is a very important decision to weigh as it could forever alter the course of your teens life, for better or worse.

Balancing Issues out before they Escalate

In an ideal world, you’d be able to address problems with your teen before they escalate to the point of you wanting to kick them out of the house. Having a heart to heart conversation is an option for honest communication and taking time to do this can be worth it in efforts to get on the same page with your teen.

What this looks like will depend on your teen, your family dynamic, and your teen’s issues.

• Take the time to listen to your teen to learn more about what is going on in their life. Their acting out could be the result of something going on that hasn’t yet been spoken about. Finding out the root cause of what is behind their behavior could bring greater understanding of the situation. 
• Notice whether they have had changes in their life. Have they stopped showering daily? Has your teens physical appearance changed? These changes can point to something else going on in their life.
• How are they doing in school? Academic changes can often be a red flag that something is happening in your teens life.
• Has your teen started to experiment with drugs or alcohol? While this is considered a normal part of adolescence, it can also point to other concerns like depression or peer pressure.
• Establish boundaries and stick to them. This can be difficult when you’re faced with a volatile situation, but your teen must have structure and rules. Plus, establishing boundaries with them will teach your child how to create their own later in life.

The sooner you can address concerns your teen is struggling with, the better you’ll be able to avoid getting to the point of wanting to remove them from your life.

Getting Help from the Professionals

Parenting a troubled teen can make you feel relatively isolated and lonely. It is important to remember that you don’t need to go through these struggles alone and without professional help.

Going to therapy as a family and working with a therapist that has prior experience with navigating these situations could very well be worth your time. 

• Start with recognizing that your approach to your teen’s behavior, and your negative reactions, could potentially be fueling the fire. With this in mind, consider the benefits that can be had if you get yourself into therapy. Therapy for yourself and other members of the family can help each person learn valuable coping skills.
• It is not just your troubled teen who needs to be “fixed.” Your teen needs to understand how his behavior is impacting his family and others around him. He needs to understand how to work through his concerns in a healthy manner. But the dynamics inside your family and home can also take a toll on his mental health and his ability to cope.

It can be tempting to give up, but your troubled teen needs your support now more than ever. It’s quite normal for parents to be the ones bearing the brunt of their angry teen’s behavior. Remember you are the stable part of their life and the constant source of the unconditional love they need.

Considering Alternative Living Arrangements

If your teen’s behavior is out of control and you’re struggling to find a way to cope, you may need to consider another option for their living arrangements. This does not mean you should immediately kick your underage teen out of the house. Instead, it could be worth it to look into other potentialities.

• Avoid making impulsive decisions when the emotions are running high. Focus on finding a solution that will help your teen find his way back to stability and control.
• Residential treatment centers are a good option for some troubled teens. They can give your teen the structure and stability needed to overcome everything he is struggling with. He will learn how to identify and cope with his underlying concerns. Whether they are mental health struggles, concerns with addiction, or something else entirely, residential treatment centers can benefit your troubled teen in so many ways.
• Feel free to Contact Help Your Teen Now for more information and to learn about other options available.

In conclusion, no matter what decision you make in the end – remember to listen to the whispers of your heart. It’s a decision that you can’t take back and that could permanently affect your relationship with your child.