Avoid The Compare Snare: How To Parent Unique Teen Siblings

If you have more than one child, you have undoubtedly discovered that each child comes with their own distinct personality traits, quirks and temperaments. As each of your children are undeniably different, it can be hard as a parent to know how you should alter your parenting to best suit the needs of your children as individuals. Celebrate Their Differences No child wants to be compared to their siblings. If there is an aspect where one of your children thrives and the other one falters, make sure you don't highlight that difference to your children. Chances are the child that lacks in a certain area is very well aware of the fact and doesn't need to reminded. Instead, you should celebrate the differences between your children. Compliment them in the areas where they excel and remind them that it's never fair to compare their weaknesses to someone else's strengths as this will just leave them feeling inadequate. Change Your Methods You learn how to be a parent with your first child, this learning process comes with a lot of trial and error, adjusting your parenting style until it's right for you and your family. When your second child comes you might assume that you can do everything the same way, but this isn't always the case. Instead you have to learn all over again as you discover what your second child responds best to and then change your parenting method to best accommodate their individuality. Alter Your Expectations As your children get older and enter their teenage years it can be difficult not to compare them. When one child comes home from school with an A in math class and the other comes home with a C it will be tempting to expect the same level of performance. Instead you as a parent need to alter your expectations for each child. Once you are familiar with your children's capabilities, you will be able to encourage more from them when you know they can do better or celebrate them when you know they've done their best. In a study published in the Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, psychologists found that children's anxiety and depression were cut in half when parents altered their parenting to best suit their children's personality. While it may be a struggle to change your parenting technique for each child, the end result will be a happier and healthier child.

If you have more than one child, you have undoubtedly discovered that each child comes with their own distinct personality traits, quirks and temperaments. As each of your children are undeniably different, it can be hard as a parent to know how you should alter your parenting to best suit the needs of your children as individuals.

Celebrate Their Differences

No child wants to be compared to their siblings. If there is an aspect where one of your children thrives and the other one falters, make sure you don’t highlight that difference to your children. Chances are the child that lacks in a certain area is very well aware of the fact and doesn’t need to reminded. Instead, you should celebrate the differences between your children. Compliment them in the areas where they excel and remind them that it’s never fair to compare their weaknesses to someone else’s strengths as this will just leave them feeling inadequate.

Change Your Methods

You learn how to be a parent with your first child, this learning process comes with a lot of trial and error, adjusting your parenting style until it’s right for you and your family. When your second child comes you might assume that you can do everything the same way, but this isn’t always the case. Instead you have to learn all over again as you discover what your second child responds best to and then change your parenting method to best accommodate their individuality.

Alter Your Expectations

As your children get older and enter their teenage years it can be difficult not to compare them. When one child comes home from school with an A in math class and the other comes home with a C it will be tempting to expect the same level of performance. Instead you as a parent need to alter your expectations for each child. Once you are familiar with your children’s capabilities, you will be able to encourage more from them when you know they can do better or celebrate them when you know they’ve done their best.

In a study published in the Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, psychologists found that children’s anxiety and depression were cut in half when parents altered their parenting to best suit their children’s personality. While it may be a struggle to change your parenting technique for each child, the end result will be a happier and healthier child.

Request Free Admissions Information

Step 1 of 3 - Your Contact Info

Written by Natalie

26 Apr, 2017

Recent Posts

Learning How to Show Your Teen Love

Learning How to Show Your Teen Love

How do you express love to your family and friends? How do you prefer to be shown love? We each have our love language. This is the way that we prefer to show and be shown affection and love. When our children are little, physical touch, protection, and words of...

Teens and Drug Experimenting

Teens and Drug Experimenting

Teen drug experimentation can sometimes be considered harmless, but that is incorrect. Many teens who experiment with drugs end up abusing them, creating significant health risks for themselves. The National Institute on Drug Abuse states that people are most likely...

6 Mobile Apps That Bring Sexting to a Whole New Level

6 Mobile Apps That Bring Sexting to a Whole New Level

No parent really wants to think about their teens having thoughts related to sex. Most of us simply want to pretend that it isn’t happening. It’s entirely too scary to consider, and in truth, it can be uncomfortable to have an honest conversation with your teen. Plus,...

How to Protect Teens Online?

How to Protect Teens Online?

Have you met up in person with people you’ve met online? It seems like many of us have, in one way or another. Today, meeting up with coworkers and new friends we’ve only previously interacted with online is almost commonplace. It could be that you’ve developed strong...

Out of Control Teen : What to do When Punishment Doesnt Work

Out of Control Teen : What to do When Punishment Doesnt Work

Just when parents think we have good boundaries, consequences, and routines down for our kids and teens, they throw us another curveball that essentially renders every effort obsolete. When teens act out and are out of control, it can make things even more of a...

What are Teen Labels in 2022

What are Teen Labels in 2022

As humans, we want to understand ourselves better and feel comfortable in our identity. There is a need to want to understand what’s going on to control it and make sense of it. Labeling helps categorize behaviors and situations. Teenagers are impulsive; hence, they...

You May Also Like…

0 Comments

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *