Avoid The Compare Snare: How To Parent Unique Teen Siblings

If you have more than one child, you have undoubtedly discovered that each child comes with their own distinct personality traits, quirks and temperaments. As each of your children are undeniably different, it can be hard as a parent to know how you should alter your parenting to best suit the needs of your children as individuals. Celebrate Their Differences No child wants to be compared to their siblings. If there is an aspect where one of your children thrives and the other one falters, make sure you don't highlight that difference to your children. Chances are the child that lacks in a certain area is very well aware of the fact and doesn't need to reminded. Instead, you should celebrate the differences between your children. Compliment them in the areas where they excel and remind them that it's never fair to compare their weaknesses to someone else's strengths as this will just leave them feeling inadequate. Change Your Methods You learn how to be a parent with your first child, this learning process comes with a lot of trial and error, adjusting your parenting style until it's right for you and your family. When your second child comes you might assume that you can do everything the same way, but this isn't always the case. Instead you have to learn all over again as you discover what your second child responds best to and then change your parenting method to best accommodate their individuality. Alter Your Expectations As your children get older and enter their teenage years it can be difficult not to compare them. When one child comes home from school with an A in math class and the other comes home with a C it will be tempting to expect the same level of performance. Instead you as a parent need to alter your expectations for each child. Once you are familiar with your children's capabilities, you will be able to encourage more from them when you know they can do better or celebrate them when you know they've done their best. In a study published in the Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, psychologists found that children's anxiety and depression were cut in half when parents altered their parenting to best suit their children's personality. While it may be a struggle to change your parenting technique for each child, the end result will be a happier and healthier child.

If you have more than one child, you have undoubtedly discovered that each child comes with their own distinct personality traits, quirks and temperaments. As each of your children are undeniably different, it can be hard as a parent to know how you should alter your parenting to best suit the needs of your children as individuals.

Celebrate Their Differences

No child wants to be compared to their siblings. If there is an aspect where one of your children thrives and the other one falters, make sure you don’t highlight that difference to your children. Chances are the child that lacks in a certain area is very well aware of the fact and doesn’t need to reminded. Instead, you should celebrate the differences between your children. Compliment them in the areas where they excel and remind them that it’s never fair to compare their weaknesses to someone else’s strengths as this will just leave them feeling inadequate.

Change Your Methods

You learn how to be a parent with your first child, this learning process comes with a lot of trial and error, adjusting your parenting style until it’s right for you and your family. When your second child comes you might assume that you can do everything the same way, but this isn’t always the case. Instead you have to learn all over again as you discover what your second child responds best to and then change your parenting method to best accommodate their individuality.

Alter Your Expectations

As your children get older and enter their teenage years it can be difficult not to compare them. When one child comes home from school with an A in math class and the other comes home with a C it will be tempting to expect the same level of performance. Instead you as a parent need to alter your expectations for each child. Once you are familiar with your children’s capabilities, you will be able to encourage more from them when you know they can do better or celebrate them when you know they’ve done their best.

In a study published in the Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, psychologists found that children’s anxiety and depression were cut in half when parents altered their parenting to best suit their children’s personality. While it may be a struggle to change your parenting technique for each child, the end result will be a happier and healthier child.

Request Free Admissions Information

Step 1 of 3 - Your Contact Info

Written by Natalie

26 Apr, 2017

Recent Posts

What is Daily Life Like at Residential Treatment?

What is Daily Life Like at Residential Treatment?

The purpose of a residential treatment center is to provide a troubled teenager with a structured daily routine. This is so teens can focus on their goals which is to heal and overcome their addictions or behavioral problems.  If you're a parent who doesn't fully know...

How Residential Treatment Has Improved Teen Behavioral Issues

How Residential Treatment Has Improved Teen Behavioral Issues

There are times when teenagers need more intensive care than a weekly counseling session at school. Residential treatment centers have a proven track record of improving teen behavioral issues and preventing relapses when it comes to substance abuse.  This is because...

What is Social Media Doing to Todays Teens?

What is Social Media Doing to Todays Teens?

Social media platforms such as Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok can be a place for teenagers to showcase their skills and connect with others. However, there are dark sides to social media that parents should be aware of.  As a parent, you should consider the risks...

How are Residential Treatment Centers Addressing Teen Mental Health?

How are Residential Treatment Centers Addressing Teen Mental Health?

Dealing with a teenager who has a mental health disorder such as depression, anxiety, ADHD, or bipolar can be difficult for a parent. You may not know what to do or how to support your teenager when they're experiencing rapid mood changes or even psychosis.  That's...

What are the Signs Your Teen Needs Help?

What are the Signs Your Teen Needs Help?

It can be difficult for parents to determine whether their teenager has mental health challenges or if they're going through a phase. As children become teenagers their personalities begin to change and they may become more moody or aggressive.  However, there are...

You May Also Like…

0 Comments

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *